My therapist said that to me this past week when I told her I was moving and would have to stop coming to see her. I’ve become one of those crazy bitches that shines a little brighter after finding out their therapist is proud of them.

It’s been…a second? A minute? Awhile? All of the above.

These days I’ve been trying to balance loving my situation (moving, new job, etc.) and the stress of it all (moving, new job, etc.) It’s hard to stick to myself and what I want while also taking the advice of those who I know only want the best for me. Eventually something is going to have to give. I just don’t know what that is yet.

And we all know what I do when I’m particularly confused. I write. I make lists. I clean. A lot. I try to take as much control of my life as I can. Sometimes it works and sometimes it just reinforces the confusion.

I think that’s a lot of what adulting is. Trying to figure out the levels of attention to pay to the various parts of yourself. Making sure that the part that recognizes advice and help is good is being seen while also paying attention to the part that is a badass individual who knows exactly what she wants.

I’ve never wanted a crystal ball so much in my life.