Well I did it. I finished the fall semester. I survived. Not unscathed (this is Camp Bobo) but I did it!
Then I survived New Years. I have always attached sentimental meaning/ value to the actual day and the day before because I’m a cancer through and through. Emotions, connections — those are what I live and love for. 2015 was a horrible year and I knew it was going to be because Emily and I got food poisoning the day before and after the holiday. It was a rough time. 2016 I knew from the start would be a good year of growth for me. I started off the evening by reflecting and being more centered than I had been the previous year.
This year, I had fun. I hung out with my sister and experienced an “adult” New Years. This is going to be the year of new. New experiences, new situations, new beginnings.
My only resolution this year is to take pictures. So many pictures. I want to capture these memories before I cannot anymore. I want to make sure I have keepsakes from my time with my friends.
My friends are all changing. All growing in different directions. I would be lying if I said I completely understood how they’re doing. That is ok, however. My role as a friend is also changing. As we are all entering a year of change, we are all doing it in different ways and shaping our friendships in new ways. It’s not bad. It’s healthy and I have to accept that. I’m working on it.
I have met someone. Someone so sweet and so different. He’s not just kind, he makes me laugh and makes me feel beautiful. I’ll keep you posted on how that situation unfolds. It’s so new and I don’t know how to go about all of it, but it’s been fun thus far and I’m letting the universe guide it in whatever direction it wants.
Warning: this next part touches upon MY relationship with faith and God. If that makes you uncomfortable, swipe left, stop reading, etc.
My spirituality has always been a part of me but in recent years, my faith has struggled. I believe that part of what made 2016 so much better for me was my return to faith and my reconnection to God. I love knowing that there is someone/something out there that is greater than me. Something that shows me that everything has a purpose and that no matter where I go, what I’m doing, who I’m with? Someone is looking out for me and has my best interest in mind.
That is what has been such a beautiful thing about this break. My friend and I often talk about faith and it’s insane. She is Muslim and I am Catholic. However, our appreciation of God and our discussions about faith bring me nothing but peace and internal harmony. Just because someone is of a different faith doesn’t mean we can’t talk about God or how He permiates every aspect of our lives, especially during the last few chaotic years.
I can’t say what the future holds but I’m ready to tackle it. To embrace new and hopefully be stronger and happier after.
Love, love, love,