What a time to be alive. What a space to habite.
The beat of my heart, the skip of my steps.
Days pass where I simply run, jump, leap, dance from place to place. I’m in no rush; there is no fire. When life is coursing through you, sometimes you cannot help yourself — the motions just flow like an endless stream of movement in vibrant, hypnotic manner.
How have I arrived to this place of calm you ask?
I took a walk one day. I slept for hours on end on another.
I had a dance party with myself. I danced in the middle of hundreds of strangers.
I cried when I was sad. I surrounded myself with people who made me laugh until I cried.
I took a deep breath and I screamed into my pillow.
I listened to On the Radio and applied it to my life. I looked inside my heart, evaluated what was there and ran with it. I ran so far with it, I thought at any moment I would walk off the earth.
I sat under the cloud of night and looked upon the stars. I locked my gaze on the first one I saw and I made a wish. Went out the next night and hit the repeat button. And again, and again, and again.
Went on a cleanse of social media.
Wore a low cut dress and drank at a bar. Stayed in my jammies and rewatched The Princess Diaries and Pride and Prejudice on a loop.
I did these things for me and me alone. Learned to love myself again.
Accepted a job interview for 2am. Procrastinated by crocheting a new hat.
Left my room despite being afraid of the unknown.
Sang girl anthems at the top of my lung.
I had faith and I prayed.
Asked for advice and took it. Learned that sometimes it’s better not to do things on your own.
Rediscovered a positive band from my angsty teen years. #superchickforthewin
Spoke to my nephew and centered myself.
Wrote.
Peace,
-M